When I was 19-years-old, I decided I wanted to get married. I figured that I would get married at a church where there was a lot of family, and I would wear a wedding dress and have a ceremony. I was wrong. My family insisted that I get married in a different church. The difference? A lot of things.
A lot of things. First, let’s be honest, this story is about a girl who is trying to do the right thing, but she’s not quite sure she can. To begin with, all her friends are going to be married this year, and that’s a problem. They all have plans and expectations, it’s just that she hasn’t made a clear decision about exactly what she wants to do with her life.
If she lets her heart rule her head, and she lets her head rule her heart, she will end up regretting her actions. I don’t want to hear that you are trying to be a good parent, you are trying to be a good friend, or a good sister. I want to hear that you are trying to be a woman who is a good human being and a good wife and a good daughter.
You are making a choice, and you have a right to make it. But in order to make that choice, you have to know what you want, what you are willing to do, and how you are willing to live your life based on what you know to be true. If you are willing to try it out, it is not a matter of if you will succeed, it is a matter of when.
When we are in the moment, we often have the tendency to make decisions based on what we think is the best option, but when we are making those decisions we often think the best options are the ones that we are the most comfortable with.
In some ways this is the opposite of what we teach in our courses. Our courses often begin by describing the decision-making process as a series of steps we can take to arrive at a decision. But when we are making those decisions, we are often so caught up in our own thoughts and reactions that we are making the wrong decisions.
The problem is when we don’t even think about the decisions we are making. Our minds are so cluttered with information that we don’t have time to think about what the best course of action is. Our actions are so automatic that we don’t even have the time to contemplate what we are doing. This can be especially tricky when we’re trying to save a marriage, say, when we are trying to decide whether to have a wedding or not.
So you don’t know what else to do. In fact, you don’t even know enough that you should be doing anything. You are just stuck on the problem. So you are making the wrong decision. And when you don’t want to do something, you don’t want to do it, even though you know you should be doing it anyway. In fact, you want to be doing it right now anyway.
If you want to save a marriage, you can’t just say it is all over. You have to go and work it out with the other person. And you have to do it without upsetting them, because the other person needs to be upset for that to work. You have to decide “okay, this is the problem, this is the answer, this is what you have to do to fix this.” Even though you know it is the answer.
I’m not entirely sure that this is true. I think we can all agree that we don’t think for ourselves. That doesn’t mean that we can’t think for ourselves. It just means we have to ask ourselves first.